Monday, March 9, 2020

Rid your Vocabulary of Business Slang!

Rid your Vocabulary of Business Slang! It’s a logical tendency to use business slang for workplace interactions- you’re seeing the same people and having the same meetings, so obvious clichà ©s creep in from time to time. Here are a bunch you should work to eliminate. â€Å"Drink the Kool-Aid†I’m guessing what you mean here is â€Å"convince† because even cults probably find this clichà © distasteful by this point.â€Å"Break down the silos†Are you a farmer trying to get your harvest consolidated? No? Find another metaphor.â€Å"It is what it is.†Gertrude Stein would say â€Å"There is no there there,† but this literally means nothing.  Ã¢â‚¬Å"Do more with less.†Double down on trite and add a dollop of vagueness for this one. Be specific! Be measurable! Be meaningful!â€Å"Tee it up.†Ah the sports metaphor. You’re not fooling anyone with that tiny putting green- this is work, not golf. Even â€Å"cue it up† is less contrived. Ditto: â⠂¬Å"Par for the course.†Ã¢â‚¬Å"Take it offline.†Unless you’re having a conversation in an email you soon intend to continue   over the phone or in someone’s office (and remember to be precise about when), a meeting is not â€Å"online† so having a different meeting is not â€Å"offline†. Similarlyâ€Å"Let’s circle back†Ã‚  and â€Å"This is a hard stop†- say what you mean without resorting to dusty, imprecise phrases.â€Å"It’s a paradigm shift.†Do any of your employees know what a paradigm is? Are you really introducing a new model or pattern? If so, why not just introduce the new thing? This is a placeholder for a real idea.â€Å"We can’t boil the ocean.†Ã¢â‚¬ ¦.what? Why? Climate change concerns aside, how is this helpful? What insight is it meant to provoke?â€Å"Low-hanging fruit†If you were a customer, would you want to be visualized this way?  Ã¢â‚¬Å"Out of pocket†We pay for things out of our pockets because that’s where our wallets are. If what you mean is â€Å"out of office† or â€Å"unavailable†Ã¢â‚¬ ¦why wouldn’t you just say that?â€Å"Move the needle.†Are you a geologist? One who studies earthquakes?â€Å"Bite the bullet.†Think of retiring this one as your contribution to dismantling gun rhetoric in the United States. It refers to the practice of biting a bullet in lieu of having anesthesia during surgery. How is this something you want emulated in your workplace?â€Å"Run it up the flagpole.†Is it possible you mean â€Å"test† or â€Å"try out† or â€Å"send to a focus group? Would you actually learn anything from suspending your idea in the air? How many ways to wave are there, really?â€Å"On the cutting edge†I feel like The Sharper Image took this phrase down- even the newest most exciting technology isn’t really â€Å"on the cutting edge† anymore. "Think outside the box.†Yawn. Thinking inside the box would be more surprising than a corporate supervisor bringing this one out of mothballs.â€Å"Peel back the layers of the onion.†Maybe it’s getting close to lunch time, but either way swap this one out for â€Å"Take a closer look.† Delete â€Å"drill down,† â€Å"unpack,† and â€Å"double-click† from your repertoire too.â€Å"Synergize†This one makes me cringe because what you mean is â€Å"synthesize† with an overlay of technobabble.I’m making a separate category for phrases reality TV has murdered:â€Å"Don’t throw him/her under the bus.†Ã¢â‚¬Å"Take it to the next level.†Ã¢â‚¬Å"If/When push comes to shove.†Ã¢â‚¬Å"I’m not here to make friends†(Okay, probably nobody says that last one at work but it’s my very favorite reality trope.)And lastly, the one I have the most personal investment in- stop using workplace â⠂¬Å"catchphrases† that have an offensive or appropriative meanings! My mom is one of two American Indian employees in her office, and still occasionally hears â€Å"Let’s pow-wow about this later† and â€Å"She really went off the rez.† You are having a meeting. A MEETING. You can tell because it’s in a conference room and not in a sacred ceremonial space accompanied by drumming and other traditional rituals. And as for â€Å"off the rez,†Ã‚   â€Å"going outside of expectations† is not the same as â€Å"escaping from the forced housing communities your people were driven to after years of exploitation and genocide,† if you really think about it.Also throw on this pile of outdated and offensive phrases, â€Å"indian giver,† â€Å"open the kimono,† â€Å"gypped,† â€Å"chink in the armor,† â€Å"peanut gallery.† If you don’t know why, look it up. Make your workplace communication meaningf ul.